I don't want any spoo.

Oh, hello. From now on I intend to do smaller updates more frequently, as my brain-sphincter is excreting "hilarious articles" with greatly reduced frequency these days.

Doctor Who, then. I'm not too sure about this series. The first had a couple of duff episodes in amongst the good stuff, but this one has been a thick sludge of duffness from the get-go, with only one or two nuggets of Good floating to the surface, surrounded by shite, like the "chav-tastic" opening episode. And the French costume drama. And the coronation episode and its interminably smug BBC wanking and self-contradictory subplot - "Your dad's a tiny-minded abusive cunt, kick him out! But oh, go after him, `ee's yer old man, the only one yer got!"

Yesterday's was the bastard creative offspring of Doom 3 and Alien, with some vagina-faced aliens thrown in for good measure. It was fun and good by this series' standards, but still pretty stupid. Hopefully though, the Satanic theme of the episode will generate a few enraged complaints from parents, thus continuing the proud tradition of hysterical Who-bashing established by Mary Whitehouse those many years ago. Oh, the episode with K-9 in it wasn't half bad either. My friend purchased a tiddly remote-controlled model of the little robomutt, and we had a funpacked afternoon running over my wee Gieger aliens with it. Simple pleasures.

I completed my terrible training course thing on Friday, which was a gigantic fucking relief. It was full of moody arseholes, including one whose "thing" was brashly going on about Muslims "taking over the country" and saying they've "never done anything for civilisation". I told him about thirteenth-century scientist Nasir al-Din Tusi's contributions to astronomy. Of course he was dismissive, but at least now he'll know who to blame if he gets killed by an asteroid. Cunt.